names

Gaby: people give up to the names they’re given. If my parents hadn’t named me “Gabrielle”, who knows if I’d be this pretty?!

Lynette: I guess that’s why they didn’t name you “Einstein”

Gaby: so sarcastic, but what would you expect from a “Lynette”?

Lynette *sarcastic laugh*

Gaby: what? If your name was “Francesca”, you wouldn’t have time for sarcasm, you would be too busy having sex.

 

———

 

Virginia: you don’t seem to happy to see me.

Gaby: well..maybe that’s because the last time we spoke, you called me “a greedy bitch” and I called you “a scary old hack”.

quality

Lynette: you worked at Cucina. That’s a 5-star restaurant.

Guy: actually, 4.

Lynette: well, that’s 4 more than we have.

 

———

Sam: this is what we do.

Little kid: you hunt ghosts?

Sam: yeah.

Little kid: like Scooby-Doo?

Dean: better.

sex.

House: I moved past threesomes, I’m now into foursomes. If someone backs out, then we still got a threesome, if two people back out, you’re still having sex. You’d be amazed. Even if three people..*intrrerupted*

 

———

 

Wilson: sex isn’t everything, House.

House: really? When did that change?

[...]

House: Wilson! How long can you go without sex?

Wilson: how long can you go without annoying people?

 

———

 

Gaby: are you still sleeping with Edie?!

Carlos: you are still sleeping with Victor, right?

Gaby: yeah, but if I don’t he’ll know something’s wrong… What’s your excuse?

Carlos: she wants to. And I’m a guy.

ticking clocks

Austin *handing her a letter*: just read this. And if you still don’t want to talk to me, then I’ll never bother you again.

Julie: fine. I’ll read it. But only if you get out of the car right now.

Austin: now?! But the power wax is starting

Julie: I know. Tick-tock.

———

Edie: life is brief and mostly sucks. Gotta grab all the good you can while you’re on this side of the dirt.

Fashion show

Gaby: i’m in shock. I mean I knew she had a shot at top 5, but to actually win?!

Vern [fashionable gay guy]: I was sure she’ll lose to that little blonde bitch who sang that patriotic medley.

Gaby: I know, she practically had sparkles coming out of her ass.

Vern: totally shameless.

tot felul de abonamente.

(17  sept 07)

uMiu: nu ti-a raspuns?

D.: ee… imi zice ca abonatul vodafone se fute-n cur

uMiu: ce tare! Si daca sun acum la Adina si nu raspunde…

D.*intrrerupting*: o sa-ti spuna ca suge pl.

murder/suicide

Paul: do you honestly believe that I’m capable of murder?

Zach [his son]: no. Of course, I didn’t think mom was capable of suicide either.

Feels like autumn – [15.09.'08]

D: nu mi-e foame. am mancat mai devreme o chestie.

R.: ‘o chestie’… Se numeste mancare frate.

D: pai nuu, ca nu stiu cum sa-i zic… nu era nici mancare, nici ceva dulce.

R.: aha.

D: si am fost cu alea azi…

R.: ‘alea’… Nu puteai sa spui si tu mai frumos…’alea’… Au si ele nume.

D: da, dar mi-era lene sa zic de toate.

R.: asa.

D: si am fost cu ALEA intr-o… *amused*.. chestie.

R.: se numeste bar, frate. Se numeste BAR.

children l0v3 [17.00-18.00]

Cosmin: vreau sa mergem la Diana!

Lucian: o sa mergem.

Cosmin: Diana, o sa vii cu noi?

D.: unde? la tine sau la mine?

Cosmin: la mine acasa.

*later*

Cosmin: Ileanaa, poot sa te rog cevaaa?

Ileana: ia zi, ce vrei tu sa ma rogi?

Cosmin: pot s`o iau mai tarziu pe Diana pe la mine acasa?

Ileana: da, ti-o imprumut. adica ti`o dau. Dar ce vrei tu sa faci cu ea?

Cosmin: sa ma joc si s`o iubesc.

parenting

Julie: how long it’s been since you had sex?

Susan *perplex look*

Julie: are you mad I asked?

Susan: no. I’m just trying to remember.

———

Julie [to Susan]: don’t play the parent card with me. I just finished packing your suitcase, doing your laundry and balancing your checkbook. And now I’m going to the store to buy your toothpaste.

[ Julie is Susan's daughter. ]

———

Lynette’s mom: in junior year you were Yenta.

Lynette: oh, you remembered!

Lynette’s mom: yep. There are some performances so bad, even alcohol can’t block them out.